Sunday, July 24, 2011

17 months

My sweet Mr. O is 17 months old. Wow.
I don't think I'll ever stop being amazed and surprised at how quickly time is passing. There has been a shift in the last few weeks and when I look at him I don't see a baby anymore. He's very much a toddler. He took his first steps just shy of 15 months and by 16 months he was walking all over the place. We went to the library last month and I let him walk from the car to the door. It was so surreal to be walking with my boy holding onto my hand. It was one of those mommy moments that you realize you had dreamed of when you were thinking of what it would be like to have a child.

Walking has really opened up a whole new world. Playing outside is now a fun option. He wakes up just about every morning with an "outside?" while pointing to the window. I just found a sand & water table at a thrift store and he's having a blast splashing and raking. He's loving his independence and will rarely allow me to hold his hand. This can be a problem while in a store or near a road so he gets one chance to hold on and then it's into the cart/stroller he goes.

His language and comprehension blow me away daily. He might have been a little slow hitting his gross motor milestones but his verbal skills are coming along nicely. Anyone who knows me is not surprised by this because I'm a bit of a chatterbox. He can tell you most of his body parts and being a boy I bet you can guess which one is his favorite! I think we're nearing 100 words that he says clearly.

O has been very interested in animals lately and we're having a great time visiting the local farm. We stop by at least once a week to say hello to the sheep, ducks, cows, goats and bunnies. I keep waiting for O to climb into the sheep pen because he looks like he really wants to get in there with them.

As for me, I'm still just loving every minute of this mom thing. There are moments that I think my heart is going to burst open. O will be just about to fall asleep and he'll lean over and give me a kiss unprompted. Bliss :)

Then there are moments of frustration and annoyance. I'm not too thrilled and blissful when he dumps his just made dinner all over the floor or simply refuses to settle down for a nap. It's not all giggles and sunshine when he's pelting with me apple slices as I bend over to pick up cheerios. Ok, that time was funny.

So far this single mother thing isn't so bad. There honestly hasn't been one minute of regret or wishing that I had a partner. That may change when this sweet little boy is a not so sweet teenager. I'll let you know.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Jumping back in

The minute O was born I was already thinking about having another baby. I blame the intoxicating new baby bliss. How could I not want to do it all over again while I was sniffing new baby sweetness? Seriously though I never wanted to parent an only child. I always hoped to have at least two children. I can't imagine life without my siblings (and nephews) and I want that connection for my son. I want O to have a sibling so that he has someone to share eye rolls over their making them crazy mother. I also hope that having a full sibling will help if he struggles with the fact that I used a donor.

Way back when I went to my doctor for my 6 week post-partum visit I asked her how soon I could start trying for another baby. I was serious about not wasting any time. She told me to wait until O was 9 months old. Then when 9 months arrived I wasn't ready. I was still nursing and wasn't willing to stop in order to get my cycles moving again. I was still busy basking in the joy of having this one baby and I didn't want anything to distract me from those precious baby moments. Mr. O is now 17 months old and I'm 40. If I was a few years younger I would wait another year but time isn't on my side and it's now or never.

It's been on my mind for months and I finally called and made an appt to talk with my RE. My insurance won't cover family planning so everything will be out of pocket. I'm hoping to skip all the testing and just jump back into doing unmonitored IUIs like last time. I hope she agrees with my plan because I really don't want to pay for blood work. I've been checking in with the sperm bank and keeping tabs on the dwindling number of my donor's vials. I need to make a purchase very soon but I'm not sure how many I should get. If I start TTC soon I'll start with 2? 3? I just don't want to get stuck with a bunch of vials or worse not have enough. Ugh! So tough! So pricey!

I'm also not 100% sure that this is a good idea. I'm mostly sure but I do have some doubts. One kid is doable and adding another is going to seriously shake things up around here.

Wrapping up the 30 day non-challenge challenge Day 22 - 30

Day 22 – What is your most beloved childhood memory? What memories are you trying to create (or will you try to create) for your child(ren)?
Family traditions! Pancakes on Sunday mornings, skipping school and work on your birthday, Holiday hoopla, etc

Day 23 – What are your favorite activities to do with your kid(s)?
Mr. O is still new enough that our activities change all the time as he learns new skills. Right now he seems to be interested in animals so we're having lots of fun visiting pet stores and the local farm to feed the sheep and ducks.

Day 24 – What are your favorite activities to do without your kid(s)? (keep it clean!)
To just sit quietly. To do nothing and not have to jump up and stop the kid from falling off furniture, pulling on the light cord, trying to open the front door or letting his cup of milk drip all over the carpet.

Day 25 – What did you want to be when you grew up? Why and/or how did that change over time?
I thought that I was going to be a teacher up until I was just about to start student teaching. I decided that as much as I loved working with kids I liked the idea of having more money better. I tried out the corporate world and even though I was making good money it was soul sucking. I sometimes wish I had stuck with my original dream.

Day 26 – What is/are the best piece(s) of parenting advice you’ve gotten or can give others?
Trust yourself. If you take the time to think through your parenting decisions and make an informed decision then don't let anyone else make you feel like you're doing it wrong.

Day 27 – Which movies or tv shows do you think are the most accurate portrayals of parenthood?
Hmmm, instead I'm going to say that I wish it was more like the Brady Brunch. I really wish I had an Alice.

Day 28 – What size family do you come from, what size family do you want, and why?
I have two siblings and lots of cousins. Unfortunately, my extended family had a falling out and I only interact with a few of those cousins. I always thought that I would have three or four kids but my life didn't work out that way. I'm hoping to have one more child so that O can have a sibling.

Day 29 – What do you think about giving kids an allowance, and what chores do you or would you expect your child(ren) to help out with?
Mr. O will absolutely have chores! Our family is a team and everyone will be pitching in to keep the household running. In addition to keeping his own things neat and tidy he will know how to do all housekeeping tasks by the time he's ready to live on his own.

I hope to use an allowance to teach O about managing money.

Day 30 – What is/are the most memorable questions or reactions you’ve gotten in regards to being a choice mom family?I've been really surprised by how positive everyone has been. I was expecting and prepared for lots of negative comments. I've also been surprised at the lack of questions. I even make leading statements thinking that my family will pounce on the opportunity to ask about the donor or the process and they never take the bait. It's so not like them to mind their own business!