Fertility

That was the subject line that screamed at me from my cluttered inbox. My heart started pounding and it was as if someone had discovered my secret and was exposing it to the world.

I opened it and it was a midwife getting back to me about my inquiry for more information on her services. Now what do I do? I have her phone number but will I be able to dial it tomorrow? I replied to her with my number and asked for the best time to reach her. I hope she calls me first. Ripping the bandage off quickly is always best.

I have set things in motion and I can't stop now if I want to realize my dream of having a baby. I didn't like the big fancy fertility clinic that I went to earlier this year because it seemed so impersonal and the RE spent more time talking about insurance codes and coverage than she did listening to what I had to say. I expect that by using a midwife I'm signing myself up for a much more personal experience. I'm really doing this. I'm finally moving forward after all those obstacles. Yikes.