Roller Coaster Day

My beta was this morning and I was cramping up with all the crossing of everything over the last few days. Since Saturday I have peed on 4 hpts and I gotta say the digital was my absolute favorite. Seeing the word 'Pregnant' is really much more exciting than staring at lines and trying to determine how dark or light they are. I was so nervous about the beta results because I really didn't want a repeat of last time.

Once the blood was drawn I was determined to spend the day as a happy hopeful pregnant lady. I didn't want to waste a moment just in case they were the only moments that I would get. As a SMC I don't have a partner to surprise with my news in a cutesy way and there is no one else who is as invested in the outcome as me. No one that is except my mother. I wanted to tell her while it was happy news and not later when I might be a sobbing with sadness mess. I stopped by the hospital gift shop and purchased a proud grandma button and drove to my mother's house. I called ahead to let her know that I was on my way and that I wanted to go out for breakfast. I wanted to make sure that she was up and dressed because my plan was to take her photo at the moment she realized that her third grandbaby was on the way. Mom didn't exactly co-operate because as soon as I arrived she was in a rush to get out the door and I had to call her back from the driveway. I handed her the pin and at first she wasn't too impressed with my lame offering. I'm thrilled to say that watching her face register what I was telling her was the wonderfully perfect moment that I was hoping for.

She'll kill me if she ever finds out I posted these here but I just have to!

I love the one in the middle because it's the moment that my news sunk in. A few minutes later we were in the car and my mother had to pull over because she was crying. Crying because she was so happy. The day was spent talking about happy baby plans and every moment was beautiful. My mother knew without me having to tell her that I needed to focus on the dream and put aside the fears of another miscarriage and worries over beta numbers. The results call was going to come soon enough. She makes me crazy most of the time but when it matters most she gets it right.

My beta is 69 and I go for the next one Friday morning. I was hoping for at least 100 but 69 will have to do. Stick around little one because your Gram has big plans for you.